David Bowie - John, I'm Only Dancing (Again)/John I'm Only Dancing

 

WHO: David Bowie

WHAT: John, I’m Only Dancing (again)  (John, I’m Only dancing)

WHEN: 1979

LABEL: RCA – BOW 4

I was at a loss as to what to write about this time. I was going to do a Halloween special and write about a spooky themed record (could have been the Monster Mash by Bobby “Boris “ Pickett and the Crypt Kickers or maybe Purple People Eater by Sheb Wooley or maybe even Ghost Town by The Specials) but I was too late, but since no one reads this anyway, it doesn’t matter. I’ll maybe do it next year, if I haven’t given up by then in a fit of apathy.

So, to help me make a decision of what to write about this time, I put a stack of records on the player at random. And as “John, I’m Only Dancing (again)” by David Bowie came on, the cat decided to make her feelings clear on the choice of tune. She hoisted her hind legs in the air, fixed me with a stare that says “what do you think of this, little man?” and preceded to scoot herself along the floor, leaving a little brown trail, and maintaining eye contact throughout proceedings. My girlfriend found this hilarious, as being five months pregnant, she can’t go within a few miles of cat shit, and so it was muggins here who was going to have to clean up after the filthy little scrote (that’s the cat, not the girlfriend. She didn’t find it that funny). So after a fun packed half hour of chasing the cat around the flat with a wad of kitchen roll in one hand and a spray bottle of Dettol in the other cleaning up all the arse trails and chocolate kisses she left on the floor (thank the gods we don’t have any carpets in the house) I decided that “John, I’m Only Dancing (again)” by David Bowie would do as a single to write about.

What can you say about David Bowie, the chameleon of rock? Nothing that hasn’t been said before, so I won’t bore you with a re-telling of facts, anecdotes and opinions that any numpty who’s used heard of Wikipedia could do, even if that’s exactly what I do every time I write one of these posts. If you don’t know any of Bowie’s music, I suggest you listen to some.

My first memories of Bowie are from the film “The Labyrinth”, a great film, with some very scary scenes (for young kids), but none so scary as the horrendously tight trousers Bowie has to wear as part of his costume of Jareth, the Goblin King. Bowie’s crotch, combined with his hair-do, very nearly renders the whole film unwatchable. Nearly.

Anyway, enough of Bowie’s family jewels.

THE A SIDE

This is a kind of remix version of the original song “John, I’m Only Dancing” which is on the B side of this disc. It’s a kind of funky disco version of the original. Recorded during the sessions for the album “Young Americans” in 1976. It wasn’t released until 1979 as a non-album track and reached number 12 in the UK charts.

THE B SIDE

This is much better, in my opinion. A more satisfying tune it’s a simpler version of the track in more of a glam rock style. Again this reached number 12 in the UK charts when it was released as a non-album single in 1972. It didn’t get a release in the US, as it was considered too risqué by the record company due to its supposed homosexual lyrical content. Oh well, that was their loss.

THE VINYL

Perfect condition this one, apart from having no sleeve. And someone must have taken umbrage to the label on the B side because they’ve half heartedly tried to scrub away RCA, using a black pen (on a black label). But it plays perfectly.

MY VERDICT

I think I broadly agree with the cat’s assessment of this track, although it’s not as bad as to warrant a dirty protest. I think it’s a case of “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”, I much prefer the original version on the B side. I’m off now to try and teach the cat to use toilet paper. Failing that, I’ve got a cork and a mallet.

The Jam - Going Underground/The Dreams of Children

WHO: The Jam

WHAT: Going Underground (The Dreams of Children)

WHEN: 1980

LABEL: Polydor - POSP 113

The Jam was a kind of punk band. They had a different look and sound to other punk bands, wearing smart suits and looking more respectable than their punk contemporaries and probably endured a lot less spitting at their gigs. I wonder then if that makes them a punk band at all, maybe new-wave would be a better description for them. Who can say for sure, its one of those philosophical questions like: if the Pope falls in a forest, does anyone hear him shit?

Lots of people like the Jam, but personally, I can’t really see what all the fuss is about. I mean I like their bigger hits like “Going Underground”, “Eaton Rifles” and “That’s Entertainment” but I can’t help but feel they were more style over substance. There is no denying that they had bags of style and the Jam and Paul Weller (songwriter, guitarist and vocalist) in particular was credited as a big influence by a lot of the “Britpop” bands of the 90s. But I don’t really get it. I wasn’t really into Britpop either though, so maybe it’s not for me.

THE A SIDE

Like I said before, I like this tune. It has a great, instantly recognizable, intro and good rhythmic low-key vocals by Weller.  Some tight drumming by Rick Buckler and very competent bass by Bruce Foxton. An excellent sing along chorus makes this a superb pop song. The lyrics are a criticism of the politics of Thatcher’s Britain and the policy of spending money of “defense”, when maybe the money could go on helping the poorest in society. It also points an accusatory finger at the electorate: “And the public gets what the public wants/ but I want nothing this society’s got…” For that line read: “you voted for this government so it’s your own fault”

The top comment on YouTube for the video is: “I want this played at my funeral”. Guffaw! How very witty. Better than the countdown theme at a cremation, I suppose.

THE B SIDE

Apparently, this was originally supposed to be the A side and with a mistake at the pressing plant, it became a double A side (although the version I have just has an A on one side). Its probably a good job that “The Dreams of Children” wasn’t the A side, because compared to “Going Underground” it’s not as catchy or hit worthy. Don’t get me wrong, it’s good but it’s no “Going Underground”.

This was the first of the Jams singles to go straight in at number one in the UK charts, and I’m not sure it would have done that if “The Dreams of Children” had been the sole A side and DJs of the time didn’t choose the better (in my opinion) “Going Underground”.

THE VINYL

I’d bought this before, but didn’t pay too much attention to the condition of it and, as well as having no middle and no sleeve (hi kids), it had a massive crack bisecting it. Bollocks! So when I spotted this for 50p at South Shields Market I examined it a bit closer. This one had a middle, and even a replacement cardboard sleeve. Result.

MY VERDICT

A good pop song with a message, delivered with aplomb, by a band I just can’t bring myself to love. Not bad, though. One and a half thumbs up.

Queen-Bicycle Race/Fat Bottomed Girls

WHO: Queen

WHAT: Bicycle Race/Fat Bottomed Girls

WHEN: 1978

LABEL: EMI 2870   

Ok, this isn’t a popular position, but I like Queen. They shift in and out of fashion and, as far as I can tell, they’re probably un-cool right now. For many people they are the epitome of everything that was wrong with rock music in the seventies and beyond. But sod it I like them. I like the decadent campness. I like the humor. I like the fact that they stood proudly in the face of the relentless tide of punk and stayed resolutely big hair and leotards, all painstaking production and decadent parties, still notching up the hits, while other rock dinosaurs were becoming quickly extinct. I like Queen.

As far as I can remember, they have always been part of my musical consciousness. I think my dad was a fan, not a super-fan, he didn’t dress up in a leotard or have a massive poodle perm, but he appreciated the music. On family trips when we were young we had one tape that we played more than any other. On one side was Queens “Greatest Hits (one)”, on which both these tracks feature, and on the other was The Pogues “Rum, Sodomy and the Lash” (weird combination I know, but maybe its part of the reason I’ve got such a random* taste in music). Anyway, I reckon my brothers and me could still sing both these albums word for word. It wouldn’t be pretty but it’d be possible.

THE A SIDE

“Bicycle Race” was released as a double A side with “Fat Bottomed Girls” in 1978. It’s a strange one this, but still typically Queen. A song written by Freddie Mercury about wanting to ride his bike? Why not? In it he lets us know, in no uncertain terms, that he wants to ride his bicycle, and he wants to ride it where he likes. An argument with himself ensues and then a great bicycle bell solo, probably the only one in rock and roll history. 

The video is worth mentioning, not only for Brian Mays hair (always good for a laugh) but also for its inclusion of (according to Wikipedia) 65 naked women, participating in a bicycle race around Wimbledon Greyhound Stadium (I have studied the promotional poster at great length and can only count 50, I’d better have another look). I doubt that video would get made today, probably all sorts of health and safety issues. There is also a reference to the other A side here when Freddie proclaims “Fat bottomed girls they’ll be riding today, so look out for those beauties, oh yeah”

THE A SIDE

A reciprocal mention on this track to its fellow A side near the end when Freddie suggests to the titular girls of the plump posteriors that they should “Get on your bike and ride!” but I’m getting ahead of myself. Written by guitarist Brian May (he with the head of hair), it is a love song (or maybe lust-song would be more apt) to those ladies of the fuller figure. This is one of my favorite Queen tracks with some great lyrics, expertly delivered as always by Mercury. Starting off with the harmonies that are trademark Queen followed by great electric-blues bass riff by John Deacon with a huge thumping rhythm delivered by Roger Taylor and some great guitar by t’other one, May. It chugs along in the usual way with the standard anthemic chorus that makes for a classic Queen track.

THE VINYL

It has a couple of minor scratches but it’s not in bad condition considering it came with no sleeve. A bit of a pity this, because the cover is fantastic. An iconic image of one of the globe arsed lovelies from the “Bicycle Race” video on her bike, photographed by David Finch.

MY VERDICT

Two great tracks by the band that is flamboyance personified.

*This is meant in the old sense of being haphazard and arbitrary, and not the new sense of being odd.

Top image adapted from sleeve of “Bicycle Race/Fat Bottomed Girls”.

Sugarhill Gang - Rappers Delight

WHO: Sugarhill Gang

WHAT: Rappers Delight (Rappers Delight)

WHEN: 1979

LABEL:  Sugarhill Records – SH 101

I like this so much I bought it twice. I got another copy so I could listen to both sides one after the other, without having to flip it over. Is that a bit sad? Maybe, but I’m unrepentant. I found the first copy at South Shields market for £1 and the other across the Tyne at Tynemouth market for another pound.

The Sugarhill Gang were assembled by late, legendary producer Sylvia Robertson, founder of Sugarhill Records, and comprised Wonder Mike (Michael Anthony Wright), Big Bank Hank (Henry Jackson) and Master Gee (Guy O’Brien). They are credited with bringing Rap into the main stream with this single.

THE A SIDE

There are a few different versions of this tune, all a different length. The version on the A side is the short 7” version, coming in at a mere 3:58 compared to the album version at a whopping 14:37.

Performed over the disco hit “Good Times” by Chic, this shows the origins of rap as an evolution of, or as a reaction to, disco and funk. Some of the lyrics are borderline genius on this track, and are still trotted out (albeit altered) by some rappers these days.

It’s definitely from a more innocent time in rap as you can tell by some of the more dubious rhymes. For example:

“Singing on and a on and on and on/ the beat don’t stop ‘till the break of dawn/Singing on and a on and on on and on/ rock, rock, yall, throw it on the floor”

At least I think that’s what it is. Mind you, this was brand new (at least as a recorded art form) back in 1979, so what sounds a bit clunky to modern ears was probably lyrical gold back in the late seventies.

THE B SIDE

As I’ve said already there are different versions of this tune and the B side is just that. In my opinion though this side has some out and out genius lyrics. For example, the bit when Big Bank Hank is dissing Superman is fantastic.

“He’s a fairy, I do suppose/Flying through the air in pantyhose/ He may be very sexy, or even cute/ but he looks like a sucker in a blue and red suit/ I said you need a man who's got finesse/ and his own name across his chest/ he may be able to fly all through the night/ but can he rock a party ‘til the early light/ he cant satisfy you with his little worm/ but I can bust you out with my super sperm“

I mean, forget Shakespeare that last couplet about super sperm is up there in the top three rhymes of history.

Speaking of the top three rhymes, the part when Wonder Mike starts rapping about going to his friends’ house for dinner is probably my favourite part, and makes me laugh every time I hear it. I wont quote it all here but I would like to submit the following for your consideration:

“So you say that's it I got to leave this place/ I don’t’ care what these people think/ I’m just sitting here making myself nauseous/ with this ugly food that stinks “

Genius.

THE VINYL

One of my copies has a scratch on the B side, which causes Hank to say “can he rock a..? can he rock a..? can he rock a..? can he rock a..? can he rock a..?” until you move the needle (which is another reason I have two copies). but the other copy plays spot on. The only thing wrong with it is another previous owner felt it necessary to write his name on the label. Thanks Les, wherever you are.

MY VERDICT

This is one of the most important records of the last 40 years, being the single that brought rap music to the general public. Because of this, and because it’s a brilliant record, it has a place of honour in my collection.  

Roy Clark - Please Mr. Mayor

 

WHO: Roy Clark

WHAT: Please Mr. Mayor (Puddin’)

WHEN: 1959

LABEL: His Masters Voice - 45 POP 581

When we got our radiogram it had been sitting in storage for about forty years, and it showed. It was absolutely filthy (you could have grown tatties on it), but when it was opened up there was a record still on the deck. It was “Please Mr. Mayor” by Roy Clark. Before I started cleaning it or got a new needle for it I plugged it in and switched it on fully expecting it to blow up in my face. It didn’t though and the only record I had to hand was “Please Mr. Mayor”, so I put the needle on it and it worked! Bloody hell! Here was a bit of technology that came off the ark and hadn’t been switched on in 40 years and it worked, it sounded terrible mind you, but it worked! Once I’d given it a clean, changed the plug and fuse, given it another clean, oiled the selector arm thingy (I’m no expert), given it a clean, put a new needle on it and given it a clean (did I mention it was filthy?), I gave “Please Mr. Mayor” another spin.

THE A SIDE

I’m glad I did. It starts straight away, no messing, right into it. In fact it sounds like the band had already started playing before the sound technician pressed play and record (that’s how it works, right?). It’s a good old-fashioned rock ’n’ roll tune, with a great Berry-esque guitar solo about half way through. The lyrics are worthy of a mention, as its basically Clark begging the Mayor not to ban rock ’n’ roll in his town, as mayors were wont to do in the fifties apparently. Imagine that! If the local council just said, “right that’s it, you can’t listen to prog-rock any more, it’s the work of the devil”. When I listen to this I feel my hair working itself into a quiff and imagine I could attempt a jive, probably followed soon after by a nice sit down. It was written by Augustus Stephenson and first recorded by Roy Clark for American label Debbie in 1958, and (I presume) released in the UK on the His Masters Voice label the year after.

THE B SIDE

I don’t know what they were smoking when they recorded this one, because compared to the A side, “Puddin’” is a bit odd. It’s a bit of a mash up of styles, a bit of rock ‘n’ roll, a bit of Country a bit do-wop and a bit of hardcore thrash metal (just kidding). It has a weird echo effect on the chorus (which is Clark singing Puddin’ in different pitches).  Augustus Stephenson and Otis Blackwell wrote this. I think. To be honest it’s quite difficult to find reliable information on the Internet about anything, let alone who wrote a song 53 years ago (but did you know the CIA and Al Qaeda faked the moon landings because of JFK, who knew!).

THE VINYL

“What? You’re going to put that where? On a record player? It’ll never play”.

Well, Imaginary voice in my head, it does play and plays fine. Granted it’s a bit muffled and there’s probably more hiss than music but it does play. Really its not that bad, but I know a few vinyl junkies that wouldn’t have this anywhere near their precision audio equipment.

MY VERDICT

When you have a 1950’s radiogram, I think you need some 1950s music to play on it, and you could do a lot worse than some classic rock n roll from Roy Clark. Even if it is Clark begging a civic official not to ban his record. He should have to declare his self-interest.

The Specials - Rat Race

WHO: The Specials

WHAT: Rat Race (Rude Buoys Outa Jail)

WHEN: 1980

LABEL: 2Tone - CHS TT11

I think I got this at South Shields market for one of your English pounds.

Once, my lovely girlfriend and me went camping in the Lake District with her sister and brother in law. On the way out the house I picked up a CD to play on the way. It was “Specials” the eponymous first album from the band (first released 1979).  The trip took over two hours. We only had one CD. And the radio didn’t work.

Thankfully this song isn’t on the first album; it isn’t even on their second, the imaginatively titled “More Specials”(1980). This single was a stand alone and reached number 5 in the UK charts when it was released in 1980.

The Specials were instrumental in the 2tone ska revival of the late 70’s, the movement being named after the record label started by Jerry Dammers, one of the founding members of group (along with Lynval Golding and Horace Panter).

THE A SIDE

Despite the repeated play of  “Specials” on the aforementioned jaunt to the lakes, I really like The Specials. And I like this tune. “Rat Race” was written by Roddy Byers (credited as Roddy Radiation on the label), not by Jerry Dammers, the usual songwriter of the band. It’s a typical Specials tune though, full of the anger of punk with the bouncy ska off beat and clever, political lyrics delivered by Terry Hall, in his distinctive laid-back style. With all this though its still a tune you can dance to. And I do have a bit skank when I put it on the record player (making sure there isn’t anyone at the bus stop outside my window first).

THE B SIDE

“Rude Buoys Outa Jail” is an out and out ska dance tune, great at a live gig. Again not written by Dammers but credited on the label to Staples (vocals), Golding (rhytm guitar/vocals) and Gentleman (or Horace Panter, bass). This tune is a lot of fun, showing the skills of the band to the full.

I was lucky enough to see The Specials at Sziget Festival, Budapest in 2010, and they were great. But I can’t remember if they played either of these songs. In my defense though, the beer in Budapest is strong, cheap and plentiful, and makes for good dance fuel.

 THE VINYL

The record its self isn’t in too bad condition and plays fine. It does however have (one of) the previous owners name written in red ink on the B-side. Wayne Thompson also decided to write his name all over the sleeve, on one side with a typewriter and on the other with the typewriter and, in case it wasn’t already apparent to whom the record belonged, in large red letters. He’d also had it stuck to the wall, as is evident by the remaining blu-tac stuck in the corners. So thanks Wayne, for scrawling your moniker all over this sleeve and record. But in Wayne’s defense he must have taken quite good care of it because it still plays well, I don’t sound this good and I’m the same age.

MY VERDICT

You can’t beat a bit of 2tone. Two quality tunes from one of the most important British bands of the last 30 years and all for 100 pennies. Great stuff! 

(Main Image at top of post taken from a photo on The Specials Website) 

Creedence Clearwater Revival - Green River

WHO: Creedence Clearwater Revival

WHAT: Green River (Commotion)

WHEN: 1969

LABEL:  LIBERTY– LBF 15250

This was acquired at Tynemouth Market for the princely sum of £1.

I’ve always had a soft spot for a bit of CCR. I can’t remember where I first heard them, but it was probably  “bad moon rising” on “an American werewolf in London” or one of the myriad other movies they have a song on the soundtrack of. I got a greatest hits album (on CD I must admit) a few years ago and realized how great (I thought) they were.

Their sound has a very “Southern” style, invoking images of the swamps of Louisiana and the humidity of the Mississippi and New Orleans. Creedence Clearwater revival came from El Cerrito, a suburb in the San Francisco Bay Area, and despite their sound, had never even seen the Mississippi bayou when they started out. The band was made up of John Fogerty (on vocals & guitar), his brother Tom Fogerty (rhythm guitar), Stu Cook (bass), and Doug Clifford (drums).

THE A SIDE

Although not my favorite CCR song, I still think this tune is great. With the typically slurred singing style of John Fogerty, the unique jangly guitar sound of a Gibson Les Paul, and thumping drums, that makes up C.C.R’s unique sound. This song makes me feel hot and sticky (careful!), not that I’ve ever been to the bayou, But I reckon this is how It’d feel. Maybe with a bit less cold drizzle and a bit more alligator.

Green River was on the 1969 album of the same name, their third release, which also features “Bad Moon Rising”, the song that CCR are probably best known for (as featured in the movie “an American werewolf in London”). The single itself was released in 1969 on the “liberty “ label, before the album was released, and reached 19 in the UK charts (2 in America). 

THE B SIDE

The B side, or in this case side 2, is another John Fogerty composition “Commotion”. This typical CCR tune starts off with a great riff, with an almost scary apache-like war drum coming to get you courtesy of Doug Clifford on drums.

I’ve heard this type of music called “Swamp Rock”, and I think that’s right. I almost have to swat away the mosquitos as I listen, and I have a hankerin’ for some gumbo and moonshine (and I don’t even know what Gumbo is).

THE VINYL

This is poor to medium condition, covered in scratches and has no middle or sleeve. But plays fine (on my 1950’s Fergusson radiogram, in glorious mono sound).  It has the usual hiss and crackle that you’d expect from a bit of 42-year-old vinyl.

MY VERDICT

I think this was a good buy. I’ve always liked Creedence so at a pound this was a bargain. I’ve had a quick look on eBay, and to get this would cost around £2.00 so if I did decide to sell it I wouldn’t make much of a profit, not that I would sell it (OK, what’s your best offer).